“Being in Survival Mode” – I have found that the thing about it is, so often, I might recognise when I am entering into it, and think to myself “Ah, I must remember I’ve entered survival mode to cope with this (whatever “this” is) – I really must remember to recognise when it is time to come out of it & put it down again… ” But once it is triggered, it becomes – for me – a constant operating mode I’m not even consciously aware I’m in. Until the opportunity arises to do the deep “unpicking” work – or something, or someone, or a quote triggers a recognition of – “Ah, yes, I recognise this within myself… Time to heal it…” And by that point – it is so embedded! And when that survival mode has been triggered as a child… Well. It can become the norm.
It did for me. And I was surprised as anything the first time I recognised that as a pattern or a trauma within me. That I was a “survivor of a war”, that I was a “refugee of Rhodesia”. I had never consciously realised where that pattern came from, why, or even what it was…
I get a sense, working with healing awareness over the last 20 years or so, that one of the great healing opportunities of this age is recognise, reframe, release that survival mode mechanism. Whether it is ancestral, generational or personal trauma related… This great sacred wound we are working to release – to move into knowing – absolutely KNOWING – at such a deep level that we are all connected, that we are all held… That we are safe, connected, loved. Held on the planet… Held within a deep sense of connection – whatever religion or point of focus we name this individually… Soul awareness perhaps… There are so many amazing techniques and healing modalities focussed around it now too! Such deep work and opportunities to go beyond the restriction and fear…
And, that it is happening now, where there is so much going on in terms of pandemics, war, oil – that challenge to recognise that we are safe, in the face of all the challenges which appear to point to otherwise…. Well – it is a hell of a polarity!!!
And we all have such different conflicting beliefs and perceptions around “right” and “wrong”.
Kindness helps. We can all access Kindness. Give it. Receive it. It is like this secret superpower to spread sunshine in people’s lives and lift them up… It is an easy superpower to own, and to use. So easy that I guess it gets overlooked. Or undervalued. And there is no judgement in Kindness – just the opportunity to give it or receive it.
Gratitude ah – Gratitude – Such a powerful force for moving us into noticing the beauty, the opportunities around us, in everyday moments… Feeling into them. Soaking in that feeling of being grateful! Even just writing that, I can feel how my lungs relax and breathe deep… This magic super power of energy that just melts the restrictions within me when it feels too big, too hard, too scary, too intimidating to reach for love, or forgiveness, or work at my own healing… Or when it is too scary to face my own fears and restrictions within me! It is like this magic, secret back door into transmuting and melting my fear and sense of restriction…
Gratitude is truly a miracle! That quote of Kevin Monroe’s – “Gratitude isn’t a cure all. However, it is one powerful cope all.”
And the healing opportunity in feeling it. Experiencing it. The secret is to let myself feel into it – and be held within it. And then, to not let myself be scared of the melting – or the tears that surface, even where or when I don’t know why they come, or where they came from, or where the big emotions come from. To know and trust that the way beyond them is through them… And that it is ok to let my body shake it all loose, and that I am – my heart – is big enough and strong enough – to hold both the fear and the trust. The joy and the grief. The heartache and the wonder.
That it is always a balance. And it can take time. And that, regardless of outside appearances – everything will always be ok. Just ok might have many different shapes… And I have to be clear with myself about which one I am willing to live with, or willing to choose to live with…
I choose Kindness. I choose Gratitude. I choose seeing Beauty everywhere… I choose living within this perspective, beyond fear….
Heart. Soul. Earth. 